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It’s hard to explain all the emotions I’ve experienced in the last 48 hours, but I’m going to try…
Don’t Ask Leading Questions {Daily Dash: August 30, 2023}
IN MY LIFE:
One of the best lessons I’ve learned in life is to listen more than we speak. That is never more true than in times of tragedy.
When we want to reach out and help, it can be hard to know what to say or how to start a conversation. “How are you?” seems too open-ended and daunting, but asking, “Are you OK?” comes across as insensitive and shallow.
I’ve spoken previously about how many people would approach me during Kariss’s first year at UNC by leading with, “Does she love it?” While the question may be well-intended, the underlying message is that anything less than “loving it” is somehow a failure. It can also signal that the person asking may not be ready to hear the authentic answer.
I’m learning that in times like this when you know someone is hurting and don’t know what to say, but also don’t want to remain silent, it’s more helpful simply to let them know you’re available if and when they want to talk and that you see them. Try something like these:
“Don’t feel the need to respond, but I wanted to let you know I was thinking about you.”
“I’m here if you need a listening ear or a hug.”
“I can’t begin to imagine what you’re feeling, but I’m willing to hear whatever you are willing to share and walk with you through it.”
These aren’t perfect answers, but it shows you’re open to receive the gift of their story.
What would you add to the list above?
Read What I Learned as UNC Parent and get my list of resources
IN THE NEWS:
- Hurricane Idalia made landfall as a cateogry 3 on the west coast of Florida
- Venus Williams suffered her worst lost in the first round of the US Open
- Popular late night hosts join forces for a podcast while their shows are still on hold during the writer’s strike
- National Grief Awareness Day
IN THE WORD:
True inner peace is impossible unless it is received from Jesus ~ Oswald Chambers
PRAYER FOCUS: Comfort
Matthew 5:4 says, “Blessed are those who mourn for they shall be comforted.” I pray you feel a comfort that can only come from above if you are grieving today.
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Hope you have a great day, make sure you make it great and don’t forget to tell someone you love how you feel about them!
