We serve a big God.
Some of you may be thinking, “Duh…that’s like lesson one in Sunday School when we’re 5 years old!”
But for someone like me who came to know Christ in my mid-20′s and is the daughter of a Jewish lawyer born during the Great Depression, sometimes I have to go back & analyze the facts and re-state the obvious so I don’t forget the truth.
And the truth is, we serve a big God.
How can I state that as a fact? Let me just share a glimpse of how my last 12 hours have transpired:
A series of events yesterday led me to question a lot of things in my personal and professional life. Obviously, the psychological burden proved too great until all of a sudden, around 11:30 last night, I started sobbing uncontrollably.
I’d allowed a couple of petty comments, texts & yes, even Facebook to eat away at me and for a little while, seriously started wondering if anyone liked me. (The enemy strikes best when it’s dark…have you ever noticed that?)
This morning, my husband blessed me by taking our son to school and our daughter (who I’m homeschooling this term) with him to help on a home decor job he had. (That’s how they bond…surely we all know she didn’t get that gene from me!).
All this to say, I found myself home alone for the the first time in about 4 months. My first instinct was to turn on the TV and drown out the voices in my head, but I felt like my soul needed the silence more.
I was literally about to sit down at my computer and type out a blog post entitled, “Am I a horrible person?” when my best friend from Florida called me.
This may not seem out of the ordinary for those of you that talk to your best friend or mom on a daily basis (or perhaps multiple times a day), but I’m not what you’d call a phone person…and neither is she. In fact, I can’t remember the last time we actually connected via the phone, but that’s ultimately not how we communicate love to each other.
But I digress.
The point is, before I could weep and moan and belabor over my keyboard about how I must be deluding myself into thinking people liked me and ultimately I must be horrible otherwise these things wouldn’t be happening to me, my sweet friend called out of the blue.
Thankfully, as only she can do with me, she gave me a ‘snap out of it’ talk and reminded me of the actual, verifiable, God-given truth that abounds in my life. (It is ultimately because of her that this post has transformed from, “Am I a horrible person?” to “We serve a big God“…)
While on the phone with her, I received a call from another one of my best friend’s in Atlanta who I also haven’t been able to connect with in forever.
As soon as I hung up one call, I got another from a local friend who I thought I had wronged because of the silence between us and realized that was in no way the truth, that they were in fact, like the rest of us, just insanely busy, but wanted to get a date on the calendar to get our families together.
THEN, immediately following that call, another sweet friend of mine (also equally difficult to pin down on a phone call) rang in, saying, “I don’t have much time, but just felt a strong urge to check in on you”.
Even as I type this, tears are welling up in my eyes thinking about the turn of events. 12 hours ago, I was believing a grossly-overexaggerated, nowhere near true thought that I was allowing to become my reality. Yes, I allowed it to take over my brain.
This morning, without me knowing, our big God orchestrated a series of events across multiple states, time zones, and work situations to allow some of the most important people in my life to converge on my heart all at once.
…weeping may stay for the night, but rejoicing comes in the morning. ~ Psalm 30:5b
So to all of you who think your life isn’t perfect (or worse, think my life is!), I wanted to transparently show you the truth: none of our lives are perfect, but we serve a God who is!!!
Life is too hard to waste time believing the lies of others. Ultimately, we shouldn’t spend even a moment worrying about whether people like us or don’t like us: our primary goal should be to live a live consistent in Christ that points people toward Him.
Yet how merciful is our God to know us so well that He would care enough to send His angels through our friends to remind us of His love when we need it most!
So to all of you out there struggling a bit like me today, know that I am praying fervently for you to receive blessing, peace and wisdom, much like I was gifted this morning.
And if you need a virtual ‘slap in the face’ to wake up out of your worry, just leave a comment below and I’ll send my friend your way